In recent years we’ve stopped going to Pizza Express in Richmond. The reason being that whenever we went it seemed to be full of families with small (and rather noisy) children. Now we have nothing against small children (we had some ourselves) but in pubs and when paying for a decent meal we’d prefer a quieter atmosphere.
So we noted the refurb of the Richmond branch with interest. Would they perhaps divide it into areas to suit different types of customers?
The restaurant reopened, and last Saturday we went along to try it.
We arrived at 6:05pm. The place was packed, but we were shown immediately to a table for two. So far so good. Then we began to take in our surroundings.
The first problem became apparent within seconds of sitting down. At the next (too close) table for two, there was a person talking to her companion across their table so loudly that it was impossible to ignore what she was saying. This was going to be a pain. It was rather like being on a commuter train ( perhaps stuck at a red light) where the entire carriage has to listen to someone bellowing banalities into their mobile phone.
Our eyes met, we shrugged. Better get on with the menu. But before that, we began to take the place in. It’s noisy, very noisy. They’ve covered the ceiling with painted plywood mushrooms. Now in the Albert Hall, ceiling mushrooms help the acoustic. In Pizza Express Richmond they do nothing for the acoustic. In fact I’m sure they make it worse. And they look contrived and fussy.
As does the rest of the decor. Glaring primary colours, blobby shapes. It’s reminiscent of a kindergarten. Which it seems it has become. Right front and centre in front of the food preparation area, half a dozen kids were rolling out dough, while a staff member span a pizza dough in the air and caught it again for the entertainment of the young clients. And scattered throughout the restaurant, maybe 40 to 50% of the tables had parties of young kids, many in a state of full and vocal enjoyment of their treat “meal out”.
Our eyes met again. Oh well. Look at the menu. Starters mostly £5 to 6. Pizzas £10 to £11. Have the prices gone up? We thought they had.
Meanwhile, our neighbour was still sharing her conversation with us. And it dawned on us that we’d been sitting there for 10 minutes and no-one had come near us.
Our eyes met again. And we didn’t need to exchange any words. We just left. On the way out, they said “Bye, see you again”. I’m afraid I replied “no you won’t”.
I’m sure Pizza Express have done their market research. They must be comfortable that there are enough people with young families in Richmond who don’t mind paying mid-range restaurant prices to eat in what approximates to a kindergarten.
But we thought it was ghastly.
Of course the reason we think this is we’ve become too old for the demographic this place is aimed at.
But we’re happy with that. And we definitely won’t be going back.
